ohh man, guys.
guess where i am. back in fort benning... i just got back from leave and let em tell you, leave was awesome!! i love being home so much!!... and i forgot how much i love being home and just hangin with the fam and friends all day and night long!!.. actually i didn't forget, i just didn't remember how amazing it was!... :-) but now its back to this army stuff and im not to pumped about it right now. i think i just need to chug my dr. pepper and take a nap. wellllll, i left GR and it was all good... and then i flew into Atlanta and that was all good to. i sat next to a man who was a major and i didn't know that untill like i was unboarding the plane and everything... he had kind of a lisp, i think. but anyway, i got into columbus and im waitin and waitin for the luggage to come through and finally the conveyor starts moving and im just searching for my bag... and searching... and looking... and wondering.. where is my bag!????... and it doesn't come in. ohh man, that bag has like my BDU's and combat boots and PT's in it... if they lost that bag then i am in trouble!! and it also has my check book in it. i wouldn't think that that's a good thing. but anyway, there was this sergeant there who helped me out sooo much! he told me i reminded him of his daughter... and he just helped me out so incredibly much! he was trying to get a shuttle for me to take back to airborne school but the shuttles weren't comin but soldiers kept on comin so there was nothing for us to ride back in. then he called up the owner of the shuttle service and chewed him out! he was like "ya know, if it was me i would kick all them drivers in the @$$ and fire 'em!" and i guess the guy didn't hear him and so the sergeant yelled it into the phone again and hung up!!... and all of us around him laughed... he was such a cool guy and you could tell he really cared about us! on the shuttle van i sat next to this civilian constractor who's getting deployed to afghanistan for a year. he was older, too, and also really cool. all these people that are older... especially the sergeant... try to help me out so much! like he was explaining to me what TDY was and PCS... and CONUS and that... i learned so much from him!.. but i still don't have my luggage and im hopin it comes in by tonight... and then guess what else! i got here and the people on CQ told me we're not having formation until 0600 on TUESDAY! that means i could still be home right now like i wish i was. i miss home. a lot. but this is what i wanted and i have no regrets. it's just always hard leaving. and this compared to being home is nothing... but it's okay. i know that once i get to my unit it will be better! being here and hangin out with friends i just met everyday is just not the same... but i should get going. i'll write later when im in a better mood!! :-)

dear diary... haha, so girlish... but i don't care! ;-)
well, this is probably my last post for long time to come. i won't have time tomorrow to write on this thing... plus i kinda need to be with my family, not typin my little heart away on this here computer. i have a strong mindset right now, i will be just fine! it's only this leaving thing that has totally weakened me. i just got back from hangin out with carolyn for an hour and a half... oh man, she's my very best friend along with sylvia! and it was so hard to leave but i did it. we decided that we will say prayers to each other at the same time... me at 12:00 (noon) and her at 1:00 (afternoon, lol) cuz we will be in different time zones. then we took picture after picture cuz i couldn't keep my eyes open, haha! it is the craziest thing, pic flashes and me just dun mix! before that we had little green licorishes and carolyn dropped a ton into her water bottle... i woulda dunked mine in coke but that didn't sound so good! then we played with abraham, her little hermit crab... :-) he has a painted shell and eats these fish things that smell bad, lol.. so after that we just sat around and chatted... i'm gonna miss that girl!! i hope that we can still be way tight when i get back... and somehow i know that we always will be! then she showed me her new skating tricks and skated on out to my van and that was it... we both had tears in our eyes.. all these last time visits are killing me! i feel like i could just lay down in my bed and waste away my life cuz this is really ripping hard on my heart... but i can't do that. tomorrow is my last day with my parents and brother.. and i am way tight with them too. i feel blessed to have the people i do in my life. even if some of them are halfway across the states, i know that they are still there for me. and i am still there for them. leaving everyone has definitely been one of the hardest thing this girl has ever had to deal with. it doesn't seem like maybe it should be, but i know you would understand if you were as tight to people like i am. these people are all that are important to me, i have nothing in this world if i don't have God, Jesus, and these loved ones of mine. if i didn't have that, there would be nothing to live for. life would not be worth it... but life is soo worth it for me! and it's hard times like these that just kill me... but i know that Jesus will make me strong through it all.. and i just have to remember that God will be with me wherever i go (joshua 1:9) He has been by my side through everything in my life... the tough times, the happy times, and times that make me want to just crawl in my bed and waste away my time here on earth. He's been here when i said my see you laters, and will be there when i say them more... but i won't ever have to say see you later to God.. and that comforts me. He will be by my side no matter what comes my way! so God, please take my hand, Jesus you take the other, and let's do this together.. please, guide me and hold my hand for always. I love you all!!    

Things to do Before I Die:

accept Jesus Christ as my savior
join the army
talk to a homeless person
save a life
do a 360 on a snowboard
go skydiving
wish upon a star
get my nose pierced
visit all 50 states
donate blood